I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
