Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
