the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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