the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
