Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
There was a lot of him and a little penis
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize