So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I intend to get homeless drunk
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
