watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Randomize
