and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
