when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
She told me I should be a condom model.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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