what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
