Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Drake has all the answers
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize