Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
