im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
