At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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