My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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