So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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