hotel room ftw
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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