i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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