yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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