this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
