They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I had to cum in my sink.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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