would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
