So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
