Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize