even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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