Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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