pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
