I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
