somebody snuck up and got me drunk
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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