i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
