I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
