I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
is it fun? or sober?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
