Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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