Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
