he puts the penis in happiness.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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