Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize