It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
