glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
