do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
