so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
He is an equal opportunity slut.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
