goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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