We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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