My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
