Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
