Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize