Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize