AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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