He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
