ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
