Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
