So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
