holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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