Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize